7 Hair Confessions I Hide from my Stylists

how to take care of hair with too much volume

how to use oils to condition your hair
how to prevent breakage on curly hair
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All my childhood I wanted long hair. You could say I had a Rapunzel obsession, but the truth is that I had a Princess Leia obsession. I mean, Rapunzel was alright, but even child me knew that much hair was impractical. No, I wanted cinnamon buns on either side of my head or a braid that could wrap around for days.

I never really had that as a child. Partly because Star Wars hairstyles are actually impossible, and partly because, well, I wasn’t that great at caring for my hair and my mother wasn’t either.

how to make hair less poofy
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My mom made me wash my hair, and I don’t mean in the normal way. I had to cleanse those locks Every. Single. Day. For years. I hated it because I have always had thick hair that craved moisture so sitting under the blow dryer for 45 minutes afterwards was hardly my idea of a good time and I was often not allowed to run around with a wet head. Needless to say, that much shampoo and that much heat would always fry my hair (seriously, blow drying frizzy hair creates more frizz…) and then my mother would cut it off to my shoulders. The cycle was vicious and there were many juvenile tears shed at my Princess Leia buns being sabotaged yet again.

When I became old enough to handle myself, I vowed never to get the chop again. I also decided to find my own way to handle my curls and body. I wanted to work with my hair – not against it. While I can’t say I’ll have Princess Leia buns anytime soon, over the course of several years, I think I have finally hammered down what works for this moptop of a head I have, and it’s not strictly what a stylist will recommend.

Do not wash daily. This causes my hair to be dry, because duh, soap is drying! When I wash daily my hair tries to absorb moisture from the humidity in the air, becomes a frizzy mess, and the breaks begin to happen in droves. Currently, I wash about every 3-4 days, or when it looks greasy. I hope to one day be able to get down to weekly washings, but for now I apply cornstarch to my hair as a dry shampoo on day 2 in an effort to stretch over more days. By the way, you don’t need to buy a nice dry shampoo. Apply cornstarch at night, wake up with clean hair.

I dry my hair with a tee shirt. This is a new trick I’ve been trying after reading that terrycloth towels can actually cause breakage. A tee shirt is much softer and gentler, thus preventing breakage and frizz. If you don’t have any old ones lying around, just grab a couple next time you’re at the thrift store.

Deep condition with coconut oil. I have gotten out of the habit, but I need to dive back in. Leaving coconut oil in my hair for an afternoon gives a nice, deep condition that leaves my hair smooth and frizz free. Simply rub some into the palms of your hands and gently rub onto the ends of your hair. Only use a few drops though, or you’ll be washing your hair several times to get it all out, thus negating the benefits.

how to use jojoba oil in your hair

Leave in conditioner. I apply oils as a leave in conditioner immediately out of the shower. I drop them into my palms and rub my hands through my hair before combing. Currently, I am using argan oil, but have tried almond and grapeseed in the past with decent results. I also use a Giovanni smoothing serum and Giovanni hair mousse. I put all three of these things in my hair while wet and then comb with a wide tooth comb.

Oil condition again once hair is dry. Yep, I condition again just to make sure there’s enough moisture. My current go to is Trader Joe’s jojoba oil. I rub a few drops into the ends of my hair every morning to prevent dryness. Speaking of which, you need this oil. Seriously, this oil is heaven in a bottle. I love it for my skin, I love it for my nails, and I love it for this beautiful thing I call a head of hair.

how to reduce frizz in curly hair
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I don’t brush my hair – ever. I know your jaw just dropped and you’re thinking I am crazy, but hear me out! My mother always made me brush my hair with 100 strokes every night. The result was…. not great. Brushing my hair leaves me with ONE GIGANTIC MANE set to rival any Roseanne Roseannadanna impersonator. So… I recently stopped brushing. I comb my hair with a wide tooth comb when it’s wet, and then not again (if I can help it) until it’s time to wash. I get fewer tangles, less breakage, and my hair lies much flatter. As a huge volume gal, I want it to be flatter. I also lose less hair overall sans brushing.

Braid it before bed: I do a loose braid before going to sleep. That way, it can’t catch on the sheets or get too tangled. Make sure it’s a very loose braid though – otherwise you may wake up with additional waves. Alternatively, if you want to wake up with wavy hair, braid it tighter.

how to reduce hair volume

Are any of these things bad for me? Some stylists might say so. I usually get mine cut a school and I have often been told using oils is useless and silly, but I can see the results. I do not admit to not brushing or only washing 2-3 times a week because I am afraid they would say I am nuts, but like I said earlier, these things work well for me, so I’ll keep them going for a good long while. I have no intention of browsing the hair-care aisle anytime soon as these all natural, healthier methods are working wonders for my long, curly hair.

What is your hair routine? Are you a long hair lover or do you keep it chopped off?

Stay Beautiful,



  • These tips are amazing, thank you for sharing! I got my hair chopped off in September and immediately regretted it – luckily my hair grows fast so it's pretty long again and I don't think I'll ever go for the chop again. Washing your hair less often really makes a difference, I currently wash my hair every second day but now I'm considering making it every third day, it would also save me plenty of time. I don't think your hair stylist would give you a weird look for that, my hair stylist has actually told me to wash it less often. I really have to try the coconut oil tip and maybe I'll stop brushing my hair, too, I really want to see if that makes a difference. xx


    • Hah, maybe I have had bad stylists… my first one thought I should definitely be doing every other day, but then again, I often go to hair school so who knows? I definitely recommend the coconut oil trick though – it works so well!

  • I follow most of these tips too! I have medium length, thick, wavy hair, so brushing is an absolute no if I don't want a huge mane. I've also gotten into only washing my hair 2-3 times a week rather than every day and have noticed a definite lack of breakage and frizz. If only I'd understood my hair earlier in life!

    Kate | girlinthebluejscket.blogspot.com

    • Right?! I wish I had understood way sooner than I did. So much time and hair would have been saved. 🙁

  • Amy

    These are all such great ideas, I'm going to have to try some of them! My hair is the opposite though, it's always flat and in need of volume ♥
    Amy xx

    Little Moon Dragon

  • OMG YASSSSS! I have thick wavy-to-curly hair too and I can't wash my hair everyday because then it gets too dry. But sadly my hair is also very oily, so I can't go more than three days without washing it or it's a disgusting oily mess! I also gently comb my hair when it's wet and then try not to touch it again. Now and then I'll use a tangle teaser to get rid of knots, but that's it. Love your hair!!!

    • We have sister hair! It's so good to not feel alone with the not combing thing… I really thought people would find me to be nuts!

  • Wow – I hear you! Our hair texture and thickness looks and sounds very similar! Your hair 'confessions' sound like great tips. 🙂 I only wash my hair every few days too. When my hair gets longer, I want to try your braiding tip.

    One thing I started recently is washing just with Suave Naturals conditioner normally, and using shampoo about every third wash. It seems to help with the dryness.

    Btw, your Princess Leia obsession made me smile because when I was little I was a complete tomboy and tried to get 70s helmet hair like Luke Skywalker.

    • Do you condition every time you shower, or are you conditioning a few times a week and only washing once a week? I am intrigued!

      Also, lol at the helmet hair comment. Totally made my day!

  • I don't wash my hair every day either. I only brush my hair in the shower & don't brush it again until the next shower, otherwise it gets like a really fluffy & hideous. :]

    // ▲ itsCarmen.com ▲

  • Love this post. Hair is always a problem child, isn't it? I wash mine around every other day most of the time and have been finding my light curls much prefer the moisture of drying themselves rather than a hair dryer since as you said, frizz 🙂

    • I found an old hair dryer recently since I am in the moving process. I think I'm just gonna donate it! I am glad there are others who refuse to use one!

  • I think it's so funny how the world works sometimes – when I first looked at your list I thought the title was click bait because these are ways to keep your hair healthy and by God, I've never heard a professional beautician enforce washing every day. As for not brushing and using oils as much as you do, it just depends on what works for you. Whether or not something is good for us, like butter vs margarine, or vegan vs a diet with red meat, all just depends on who's winning the argument at the time. But it is always going to be different for every individual.

    I do know that you will loose 100 hairs a day, and that's normal, so if you are worried about hair breaking when it's only the natural process your follicles go through, I think you should take another look at what's really happening.

    Lots of love, Beka – http://www.bekaellen.com

    • "when I first looked at your list I thought the title was click bait because these are ways to keep your hair healthy and by God, I've never heard a professional beautician enforce washing every day"

      Firstly, I am so sorry you felt it was click-baity. I DO try to always include some meat in my posts. No one one wants a hollow nutshell. However, if there's anything this post has taught me, it's that apparently I need to go to a real hairdresser next time. I am guessing a student somewhere told me I needed to wash more at some point and that kind of stuck around. I only go twice a year, so maybe I'll be more open and honest next time!

      I did know that it's normal to lose hairs, but I definitely do experience breakage. My hair is long enough that I can see the split ends and little broken hairs on the ends of my braids. 🙁 But! The oils definitely helped this past winter, so I am hoping for longer, healthier hair in future years!

  • I use a tee shirt or microfiber towel. I never brush my hair either unless I am straightening it. I have crazy hair that if you look at it, it gets angry. Also HANDS off. Running hands through it makes it frizzier than a poodle in summer. Great tips!